Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Bluetooth


The term Palestinian Bluetooth was coined while driving on the Dan Ryan Expressway on March 21, 2008.  I was driving from St. Paul to Chicago en route to a Black Hollies show at The Note.  In bumper to bumper traffic I looked to my left.  I noticed a woman incessantly talking on her cell phone while both of her hands comfortably maintained the "ten" and "two" positions on the steering wheel.  I was blown away by the fact that the entire cell-phone was fastened to her head, held in place with an elegant cultural head wrap.  Seeing this kind of  absurd ingenuity inspired me.  Hence, I give you Palestinian Bluetooth which by its very essence refers to the use of  any kind of renegade rigging to attach an entire cell phone to your face in order to go hands free, beautiful because it represents the refusal to take the easy way out.  I had to exit the Dan Ryan immediately after coining this term because the power steering went out as a result of an important pully in the engine going on the fritz.  The band magically coasted along surface streets leaking oil profusely and stopping at exactly the front door of The Note where the band's first extended tour would end.  Two thousand dollars and three days later The Black Hollies would eventually make it home.  Considering the circumstances under which the van broke down and the fact that the van itself is a light shade of gray-blue, the band is thrilled to announce that it has decided to name it's van Palestinian Bluetooth as a gesture of good faith and a reminder that the easiest way is always the most boring and least fruitful.

3 comments:

J. A. said...

Finally! A blog that I can identify with. Thank you for inspiring me to keep my chin up above murky water. Wishing you all the very best.

Nick said...

I guess we have a name for the van now. "10" and "2" We've never been given the opportunity to take the easy way out. Perhaps it's really not that bad?

Dead Flowers said...

When do we get the scoop on the recording of the sure-to-be-smash-hits from Beauty Ray?